alias: devsgirl // W // Pooh thinking: dear god, please let me finally graduate reading: thesis chapters watching: nothing, am working listening: birds chirping lusting: boyfriend! girlfriend! quote: "And so we had to come up with an episode that obviously hadn't been done, which is very difficult because Stargate has been on the air for a few thousand years." ~ Joe Flanigan
Good news: I made a decision. Yes! A very grown-up decision. Bad news: Because of decision, I will not be making any spontaneous last-minute trips to Detroit this weekend. (We will ignore the many agonizing hours of waffling and the EVILNESS of three evilly persistent people, who know who they are.) If I had a job, this would have been a non-decision and my ass would be on the first flight out tomorrow. *sigh*
Good news: I have 6 of 8 subjects tested. Bad news: I need another 2 and don't know anyone who will help without asking nosy irritating questions. *lalala*
Good news: I am outside of the apartment. Bad news: With data almost done being collected, I wanted nothing more than to be lazy and stay in bed this morning.
Good news: I am actually eating lunch instead of skipping. Bad news: I haven't exercised this past week. There goes the new me and the new health plan.
Good news: There is no corresponding good news. Bad news: I still need an interview suit and it's harder to find a good black one in the middle of summer. Bah.
Good news: I got free ice cream yesterday. Bad news: Boys are evil.
Good news: I am in the midst of being caffeinated right now. Bad news: This Dunkin Donuts iced coffee tastes like crap cooled over. I think I hit the bottom of the pot because it's all bitter and gross even with the sugar added in, which makes no sense because DD usually has great coffee. May have to chuck it and go splurge on the Crack. Except see bad news above.
YAY! 2 more victims to go! And how frustrating was it that the Roomie was the only one who placed his mics in the optimal places on his chest and all I needed to hold in place was the neck mic? So far he's got the best data. 2 more subjects left to collect data on, and then I get to analyze all the data. I'm thinking half of that data's gonna be crap. The other guy I tested today had to hold his chest mic in place and even then he was getting lots of noise and I'm not sure if I can filter the noise out of it. May have to go back and retake data again later on. And don't get me started on the crappy data Thing2 and her friend provided. *sigh* Human test subjects can be so fickle. Memo to self: next time, do computer simulation and modeling ONLY.
PoohBro's been IM'ing in frantic 'I'm not done packing! I don't know what clothes to pack!' panic. PoohDad was supposed to help him, but he's on a business trip and won't be back until tomorrow morning -- that's 2 hours before he has to take the PoohBro back to the airport to catch his flight. Also in the panic are 'how the hell do you make playlists on the iPod!' IMs. *squishes* Still hate him, omg THIS MUCH because he's an evil brat. But there's something very scary and woobie-inducing thinking about the PoohBro getting on a flight to Japan by himself, changing planes by himself, and then flying to Taiwan by himself. And who knows if someone from the program will be there to pick him up at the airport. He barely knows Chinese! Baby brothers shouldn't be sent out into the real world like that. (And how much does it SUCK that hating his guts so much sadly doesn't negate the overwhelming love? Damn family ties. Hrmph.)
3 more victims to go... Painful. A lot of the signals aren't coming out anymore. Not sure if even excellent signal processing and data analysis skills will help. *sigh*
EVIL! *glares at Rach and Steph* No fair tag-teaming! My free miles aren't safe... *woobie*
I leave for a few minutes and come back to see both of the new lab members gone. And yet, one of them left their circuit board still hooked up to the computer. I don't think it's a question of when they're coming back because the lab door was locked and the lights were off. Umm... NO. You don't leave your shit hooked up when there are other people who need to use the same computer. Hell, even I take apart my setup every night and I have two boards and 11 fragile connections to hook/unhook. Guess someone is going to find out the hard way that they can't just leave their stuff out like that because I'm going to have to move it in about two hours (at the latest) when the roomie comes in to be my victim. I'd feel sorry about it, but it's their grad project and if they don't care enough to safeguard it, then why should I respect it more than them?
Yes. Am in BAD MOOD.
Hmm... need more caffeine? Or maybe just food, for have not eaten all day...
Also, Rach is HATEFUL. Sending me emails for cheap plane tickets and then ordering me to go to Detroit. Will not do another frantic search. Will not do another frantic search. Will not... oh, hell, I will do another search. *eyes free mileage, wibbles*
Over the past few months, I've come to realize a few things: 1) I am no longer addicted to Coke or Pepsi or any other kind of carbonated beverage, 2) all those Rabbit stories about stealing my cans of soda make me cringe now because I am fully cured of that addiction, 3) I have long since gotten over my coffee phobia and its diuretic effects, 4) Thing2 and Jenai, working separately but together, have managed to get me hooked on Bux, specifically, and 5) my life is very BORING and SAD and PATHETIC. And as such, I see my last month or so of blogging (here) has consisted mainly of research ranting, job hunt delirium, and Bux stalking. This will probably continue until July 15, when the boyfriend comes back on TV to save y'all from Pooh's Real Life Boredom. And so... continuing the monthly theme:
Where I wax poetic on the Retail Industry...
Having worked in retail with the mom over various summers and weekends, you get to know the 'regulars.' After awhile, you start remembering their names. Granted, 'regular' for the Mom was someone who shopped at the store for the 20+ years it's been under first the Aunt's ownership and then the Mom's. I practically grew up with some of those customers. So how wonderful is it when you actually remember their names and treat them as friends than as an average customer? This is why I stalk the BuxBoy. Even though I am no longer actively stalking him for I have deemed him uncute and a brat and other stuff.
...on Stalking Food Service People...
Ok, I am still sorta semi-stalking him but that's only because my life is boring and I'm easy and I need my new crack. Except today, I've decided on a new Bux game. With the exception of Tom and Nicole (ok, how wrong is that?), everyone else there gets my name wrong. I've been called Wendy, and today was a new one: Windy. The fuck? What killed me was that two of the guys there who insisted on getting it wrong, are always working when I'm getting my fix. Including that OneGuy who always always always asks for my name. So the first game ended when I did indeed get my discount from BuxBoy. Now the new game is to get this OneGuy to actually remember my name. It's not like I've got a really common and forgettable name, right? Okay, SHUT UP, I am bored with my life and have nothing else to amuse me ever since I stopped working with the Stooges over at the old company. I am perfectly aware that people get themselves committed (and subjects of restraining orders) over OCDs like this. I don't care. When I'm finally ready to sit down and actually write the damn thesis, I will sit there until he gets it right... and that also has nothing to do with the fact that I will be able to get an IV drip of my mocha while writing. That's just a bonus.
...on Common Names...
So Thing2 told me she's now dating a food service guy -- some manager of an Outback. Dude, if everything works out, the PoohSibs can have the entire food industry covered, lmfao. Thing1 just needs to drop her computer nerd for a pastry chef or something. But that's besides the point. The point is, his name is George. Which is really odd because this makes the count of Georges I know to an unhealthy 4. Four. No one should know FOUR Georges. That's just wrong. BuxBoy also makes the 4th Tom I know. And let's not even get started on the number of Mikes in my life. I'm not even counting the generational quirks like how all the Jennifers I know were born in the 80s. Have we run out of names? And why are the only people I know with unique names all online?
...and on Other Revelations...
I've reevaluated my standards for The Perfect Man. The list has been shortened from 103 things to this: makes me laugh, can cook, has a job, will wow the parents, understands the boyfriends, and will keep me high on whatever my new crack is at the moment. No, I'm not desperate.
I dare someone to psychoanalyze me. Dare. I've had people want to before, but got too scared to actually do it. I'm really not that fucked up, am I? Ooooooooo, what's truth and what's imagination born out of being massively BORED right now? Sigh. *pokes everyone*
I have nothing else to do because two of the newer lab members are hogging the data hardware so I can't run any tests. And there's no victims around, anyway. Hmm... see... I even ended on a research rant. So now all my daily blog points are covered in this one entry. *pats self on back* Sheesh... if I'm going to be waiting forever for the lab equipment, I might start vidding or ficcing again just to pass the time instead of insane blogging. *bored*
Victims needed: 4 Data analyzed: none, it's not July yet Job hunt: Bastards, all of them Days until PoohBro leaves: 1 *sniffle* my baby! even if I hate his guts
Now I know why the advisor said to get 8 victims instead of 6. 'Cuz sometimes, even when you've got them purposely trying to help you get better data, it can still suck. Oh well. This is why there's signal processing and mix-and-match. (Shhh... y'all do realize I'm giving away half my secrets here, right? That's IP, dude.) Thing2 came and brought a friend. So now I officially have 4 sets of data. Halfway there, but quickly running out of people who either know enough to help me optimize data collection or don't know enough to question why I'm touching them. For see... the mics are sensitive but sometimes not sensitive enough which requires someone to hold them down a bit, and the victim needs to stay relatively still for the ECG. (Does anyone want to be a victim? I will buy lunch. Or dinner, depending on how great your signal is. It could mean a free fondle from the Pooh... Hmm, wonder if BuxBoy wants to give it a go... even though I'm no longer stalking him and he owes me, that bastardwhore.)
Somehow, the ECG circuit is now producing an upside-down output. Makes no sense. And I didn't figure out it was the actual circuit and not, say Thing2, until after I finished with her and told her she might need to see a doctor. But I feel entirely justified in saying this because not only was her ECG upside-down, but it was all funky-like. And then that bitch's cell rang and she jumped up to get it. While hooked up to two circuit boards. And pulled about half the wires out of the board. Sheesh. Her friend was nice, but she didn't tell me she had put on lotion before she got here. Which, duh, in hindsight, would explain why the electrodes kept falling off. But she was a lot more helpful with the manipulation than stupid Thing2. Hrmph.
Anyway. Halfway there and roomie tomorrow. Yay.
Victims left: 4 Signals processed: none, but I snurched the analysis software from the comp for Harold to play with (lalala) Deadline for the last few victims: THIS week, for sure, omg. HONEST!
Went through all the data collection (16 tests) with LabFriend. ONLY to discover... yeah, the file autosaves weren't working. WHY? Because this fucking program works on a counter-intuitive level. Instead of setting it to "save to disk," it only autosaves under "save to fucking MEMORY." Ok, that's not the correct wording for that option, but close enough.
STUPID FUCKING PROGRAM!
So yeah. I had to force LabFriend to redo all the tests again. And lucky for the both of us, we already knew how to manipulate his data do it and it went much faster. I think the data I got the first time round was much better, but at this point, I'm not being picky. I will SIGNAL PROCESS the shit out of all of it anyway. And despite my being such a freaking GOOBER, LabFriend still tried to make me feel better by saying that once I come up with conclusions, we can retake more data to support it (lmfao - nope, not doing it backwards at all, lalalala) and that the purpose of this degree is just to show that I actually can do research and that it doesn't necessarily have to be right. God, I love when friends try to make me feel better because it always comes down to reassurances that it's okay for me to be a complete tard and goob. And I don't mean that sarcastically. I EMBRACE my goobertardom, dammit.
Victims remaining: 6! (and roomie said he'd do it tomorrow, yay!) Chapters left: 2.5 (meh) Signals processed: none, but will start as soon as more data and... motivation Days until PoohBro leaves for month-long Taiwan trip: 2 (am SAD)
Have gotten here early, rehooked myself up (the pain!), and checked circuit. Everything looks to be working. Now, if only people would show up so I can make them my victims and save me from refreshing LJ every two minutes for the next few hours. *sigh*
Victims Remaining: 7 Chapters to Finish: 2.5 Analysis to be Done: way too much # of Bux Drinks: 0. That's right. ZERO. *twitch* Email/LJ Refreshes: 5? in the last 8 minutes?
This deserves more than just your average head/desk. This requires full body slam head first at 100 mph against a brick wall.
So one guy in the lab busy finishing up his grant proposal. He said he'd let me collect data on him at 6pm. Around 5pm, STUPID ASS MAINTENANCE people come in to say they're stripping the floors in our lab and it'll take a couple of hours. Then, without even asking anyone if they can touch anything, they start moving shit from the floor onto the benches and tables. UHHHH, EXCUSE ME, but there are circuit boards and crap all over the place because this is a WORKING LAB.
WHAT
THE
FUCK!
First, they were supposed to do it LAST FRIDAY. Second, I had to take apart all my circuit boards from the data pack so they wouldn't touch it and fuck it up. Third, that's a couple of hours I could have had taking more data (seven more to go, seven more to go, gotta find seven more people, dammit). Fourth, WHAT THE FUCK.
I am very unhappy. And it's still raining and gross outside, so I can't even go for my few laps around the track.
Just me so far, but I've got 10 different signals, half of which actually look like they might be good. And I haven't "signal process"-ed the graphs yet to make sure they actually mean anything. But.
I. Have. Data.
Seven more people to go and I can analyze the shit out of it, write it up, present it, and get OUT.
Rain. Crazy rain. Insane scattered thunderstorms only without the thunder, which I'm perfectly happy with since I've developed lightning phobia ever since the tree right outside our house got hit, split down the middle, and half of it took out our gutter once upon a time.
But there's something fun about getting ridiculously wet while running from building to car.
Got all the circuit boards over to the acquisition system -- not as easy as it sounds because there's so many damn wires. Hooked everything up to myself -- 3 leads and 2 mics and a whole bunch of output and power cables. Ran the thing. Got a GORGEOUS chest sound signal. Not so much the neck, but I can fix that with a bit of pressure - so wrong, and yet, who cares. But dammit, that ECG circuit HATES ME as much as I HATE IT.
GRRR. I need a drink. Forget caffeine. I need something cold and full of liquor.
ETA: Nevermind. I figured out what was wrong with it, after half an hour of fussing with it. Stupid thing isn't reading the power input. WTF. *KICKS IT* Now I'm going to bring everything BACK to the computer, hook myself up again, and if it doesn't work, I will KILL it.
My cousin is now a father! It's one thing to know that his wife is pregnant, but an entirely different kind of freaky to know there was an actual birth. This is the same guy who I grew up watching cartoons with. The same guy who made me do his book reports for him. The same guy who still pranks the 'pull my finger' gag when I see him.
*boggles*
His wife is a little over a year older than me. WTF. *twitch*
And what kind of Chinese name is Caleb anyway?
*sigh* People need to stop doing things to remind me how old I am because I don't feel it yet, and it hurts to remember.
In other news, the Poohrents have planned a late summer cruise with the PoohBro and Thing2. They asked me if I wanted to go with. On one hand, cruising with the parents is just... no. On the other hand, a free cruise paid for by the parents is... nice. But THEN I remember I'm supposed to be finishing this summer and therefore need all my time to actually finish and find a job (both of which have stalled due to the WORLD and EVERYONE in it and all the ELECTRICAL CIRCUIT BOARDS hating me). Being responsible sucks sometimes. Where's my Megaball Megamillions Megawhatever win right now? Meh.
Came home to find him cradling his new iPod in his shirt because he 1) didn't want to put it down lest it get scratched, dirty, or fingerprinted, 2) hasn't had time to buy a case for it yet, and 3) is in lust with it.
Have seen the graduation pics and HOLY HELL. I will be exercising in a few minutes. Running every other day. Pilates every other day. I will get back into the groove and stick to it. I will eat salads every freaking day. And I will never have my picture taken. Ever. Again.
What was that commercial back in the day? 'I learned it from watching you'? Yeah. I think I figured out where I get my messed up concept of boy-girl relationships. The background: PoohMom couldn't decide whether to save the leftover sauce to use in a new dish for tomorrow. She hemmed. She hawed. She finally decided to save it. The catalyst: PoohMom snarked PoohDad for making too much rice. (Yes, PoohDad and PoohMom take turns cooking.) There is long story involved with the why part of the issue, but there was definite snark. The resolution: PoohDad takes the sauce and dumps it when she's not looking. Conclusion/Discussion: Pettiness runs in the PoohFamily. I don't know how to live without it. Don't know if I want to, either. Is that bad? Do I need help?
AHA! I was RIGHT! Just checked Amazon and my edition textbook has almost 80 pages more than the newest edition. EIGHTY! Hate when textbooks go on diets and still cost the same price. Bah.
Gonna keep spamming the blog because I know Meg can't read the entries until we're both online at the same time or the day after. (One, you thought my blog hated you. Apparently, it hates Meg even more.)
No love! It's over!
Steph! Remember what we talked about last time, with the "freeze" and the sarcasm about the face fuzz? Yeah, well, I thawed a bit. lmfao. I think this deserves a celebration.
Jenai, I am sitting here with my vanilla latte and feeling REALLY GOOD about it. I even reached Norm! status. Finally! The BuxBoy - or Tom, which is all sorts of icky because that's the PoohBro's name - stopped in the middle of helping other customer to say hi to me (I am celeb! ha!) and then tried to order my usual for me (I have a usual! lmfao. 'venti iced tea, sweeteened with classic?'). Poor BuxBoy, though, because he only ever gets me when I'm on my iced tea kick and I've been downing a lot of lattes instead lately. I may have confused him. And the fact that I was only going to get a grande this time means it's NOT MY FAULT I ended up with a venti, because that's the order he put through. And then he gave me a discount of a few cents (bastard). And then forgot to put my order through because he took it while still helping the guy in front of me pick out a drink for a friend (grr). (This confuses me - how do you pick out drinks for people who aren't there and haven't told you what they like?) And now I'm all conflicted. On one hand, I think the fascination with BuxBoy is over, as is my game with him (apparently, he's been playing a game, too! the hell) so that means I won't be quite such a Bux freak. On the other hand, I've reached Norm! status and to give that up would be... stupid. Right?
Maybe I should learn how to love Dunkin Donut coffee more than my Bux.
And YAYNESS! Was going to blog about how LabGuy still didn't come in yet to help me, but in the middle of typing this, he did. And it WASN'T ME! One of the leads was loose and he fixed that. And YES! I DO have a ECG waveform that doesn't look frelled. So very nice to know that I am, indeed, ALIVE.
I am suffering way too much heartbreak for my missing book. I'm even terrified I took it home myself and it's hiding out somewhere with my yellow lab notebook that I was trying to find last month. I guess this weekend will be spent ripping apart my room and the parents' house. In the grand scheme of things, it's not that important, but since I can't COLLECT DATA which is even more important than the book, I feel I need to at least do this to be somewhat productive.
Trade-offs = a highly sophisticated form of procrastination
Must get some Bux now because I deserve it. And it will make me feel better. And I will even go as far as getting the whipped cream on my mocha, dammit.
LabGuy emails to say he fixed the circuit and 'good luck.' Ok, tested it on myself and...
It's not giving me a ECG wave. It's giving me a damn pulse pressure wave. The HUH? And someone stole my medical physiology textbook, the one I purchased and treasured since undergrad (DAMN YOU, WHOEVER YOU ARE, RETURN IT, YOU RAT BASTARD WHORE!) and my cardiovascular physiology text (the FUCK! Buy your own damn books!) so I can't even check to see if the wave is valid for one of the leads. But I'm using the standard leads and I KNOW an ECG isn't supposed to look like that.
*CRIIIIIIIIIIIIES*
Maybe it's just me. Maybe my heart is frelled up. Dammit, why aren't people here when I need them to be here!
And I miss my book. Not so much the CV text because I only got that during grad, but my med phys book which cost me $150 as a sophomore and has been my research bible for EVERYTHING ever since. I don't care if there's a new edition out. The new edition looks skimpier than mine did. And mine had a pretty dark green cover and I knew where everything was in the book and I took a bunch of graphs out of there for chapter 1 and will need them in color for the presentation and and and and and.... No one here will 'fess up that they took it or even remembers it sitting on my desk. Dammit. Why couldn't they have stolen the physics book I have there or the bio book? WHY my BABY?!
It's not right to be so sentimentally attached to a freaking textbook, but I am. It's ridiculous how insanely attached to that book I am. And... GRRRR, if I don't find it... I may end up buying the newer edition just because that textbook is seriously the Best Thing Ever. I will even learn to accept the anorexic new edition and it's ugly puke yellow cover. *SOBS*
God, I'm so terrified I let someone borrow it two years ago and they never/won't/refuse to return it. Please God, don't let it have been that.
My eyes. They burn. Why do I insist on reading things that don't deserve to be read? Ugh. Way worse than the boiling sac fic. At least that one was (inadvertently) funny. This just hurts.
I am chickenshit. Yup.
LabGuy's EKG circuit doesn't work. WTF. I need data like two weeks ago, dammit. He kept telling me that it worked, and just when I finally decided "fuck it, I'm just gonna collect data using my crappy circuit and explain everything away using my Supa Powers of Bogus Data Analysis!"... I find out it doesn't work. Even after he got that third cable for me. Seriously. Like the whole world is against me.
Will buy LabGuy dinner if he gets his circuit working again so I can definitely take data on Monday. It's practically July. There is no wiggle room now. I don't care if the prof told me I technically had until October. I NEEEEED OUT. Crap like this needs to stop happening. It's no wonder everyone keeps teasing me about my "definitely have data collected by the end of THIS week" mantra I keep saying... and have been for the past few weeks. GRR.
Really big chickenshit. (You don't need to know the details, just agree. And I know you do.)
Is it messed up that it's going to be 95 degrees today but I refuse to NOT wear my hoodie? (Meg, you can't answer this because you don't count, ya freak. *mwah*) But I left it unzipped...
The PoohBro has officially graduated high school. It was weird sitting there on the bleachers, being back at high school and seeing all my former teachers and a whole bunch of new teachers I don't know. Really weird. And so was the realization that (ok, totally biased, even if I hate him a lot of times) the PoohBro? Is sort of a major cutie. With potential to reach hottie geek status, even. Now THAT, is really fucked up. I don't like thinking of the baby as a grown up! It was also really weird to see him interacting with all his friends. Nothing's more disorienting than realizing that the baby brother IS a real person with his own life. :(
And yeah... I got all sentimental and a bit teared up because I'm a freaking GIRL about stuff like this. Although, that may have been due to my forgetting the reason why I stopped wearing my strappy sandals -- one of the straps took a huge chunk of skin off the side of my foot. I can barely walk on that foot now. OWWW.
Next week, when the PoohBro leaves for his month in Taiwan, the nest will be officially empty. *sniffle* Hmm... I need a life now, so I'm not the only one still going home to mommy for stuff. And on that note, it's messed up how the entire family is already talking like I'm going to California, up to the point where the bro was pretty much planning a family vacation to visit me.
ETA: LabGuy finally showed up. He had car problems. Thanks for calling, jackass. And we just found out that his EKG circuit? He let someone borrow one of his cables and they never returned it - from a year ago. You know, something that could have been brought to my attention WEEKS ago. Argh. Anyway, he's gonna go out and get a new one and show me how to use it tomorrow morning. But then we have to go to a friend's defense, and that's pretty much the morning wasted. And then I have to go to PoohBro's graduation, and that's the afternoon/evening wasted. I just cannot catch a break, it seems. And for reals, people. I know I say it every single freaking week, but definitely by the end of next week and hopefully even before that, I will have all my data collected. Analysis is a bitch but I have complete faith I can churn that shit out like no one's business. And writing is pffft. At least I remember writing used to be pffft, it's been so long since I've actually written anything... And yeah... defense by the first or second week of August. MARK MY WORDS! *dies* *prays* *sacrifices virgins and non-virgins*
For Steph and Meg (and Jenai, even though she will KILL me):
The Adventures of Crackhead and BuxBoy: The Wet T-Shirt Contest
LabGuy called to say he wasn't going to make it in until 4PM, which sucked because Pooh needs to know how to use his circuit in order to take data which she can analyze and then use to FUCKING GRADUATE ALREADY. With an hour to kill, Pooh decided that 'No, the DD iced coffee from this morning did absolutely nothing' for her and that she had enough time to make a quick Bux run. So Pooh gets into the car and heads off to get her caffeine crack.
About 30 seconds to Bux, it starts to drizzle. No biggie, thinks Pooh. As soon as she pulls into the lot, No Biggie turns into HOLY FUCKING SHIT because the skies split wide open and even at the fastest speed, the wipers couldn't keep up. Since Pooh is already parked, she waits a few seconds hoping it's just a passing storm. When it doesn't let up, she thinks 'screw it' and runs into Bux. Kinda hard to do when you're trying to avoid the big ass puddles scattered through the lot.
There's a guy being helped, so Pooh waits quietly, dripping dripping dripping. And you know what? It's not just white t-shirts that get incredibly see-through when wet. Pooh was wearing a pink button-down because she's taking heart data, which requires easy access to chestal areas (thought I'd throw that one in for free), and that shirt? Totally soaked through. (Hmm. Must remember to keep umbrella in car.) So of course, Pooh thinks it's the most hilarious thing ever, which the Bux guy comments on because as soon as it was Pooh's turn to be helped, he mentions how incredibly happy Pooh seems despite the weather. Pooh's response was that it's hard not to laugh when it's raining like THAT and Pooh's still dripping even though she was only outside for five seconds max. (Also, you know, totally getting a BuxFix, which is always a good thing.) Alas, Bux guy was not BuxBoy, so the teasing whatever was totally wasted (even if I still can't decide if BuxBoy is cute at all or even enough to deserve Pooh's attention).
In fact, Bux guy was the one guy there who never ever ever ever ever remembers Pooh's name. Some guy came in after me and we chatted about the weather and about the whole ridiculous cup size naming thing (which Bux guy tried to explain, but seriously the smallest cup, despite being 'tall' is still 'small,' kthnxbye.) And now I KNOW I'm not a BuxFreak because Bux guy can't remember my name but he knew this guy no problem. Of course, then I find out that this guy has been frequenting Bux for forever and even followed around the manager from Bux to Bux as she opened up a new store. Now that, my friends, is the epitome of a Crackhead.
It was still raining really hard when I turned to leave, which sucked because given the right incentives, Pooh could have totally stayed to continue chatting with them. But no. Instead, she ran outside to the car, spilling half the foam all over her, which was immediately washed away by the rain. And by the time she got back to the lab, the rain had stopped almost completely. GRRR! And LabGuy STILL isn't here, and dammit, I want to DO THIS so I can get a real job and be paid real money.
Well, Hackensack is iffy. Lady said she's going to "introduce" me to the company and that I'll hear back before the end of next week. Is it wrong to feel kind of relieved that this might fall through? I mean, Hackensack. And from the summary I got, it's only marginally related to what I've been doing the past few years, which is okay considering my contract states I'm not allowed to touch the same stuff I've done for the next two years, but... still, I don't want to go in completely blind. (Also, still need to get a suit, so interviews are pretty much pffft right now.)
I really hate to admit it, but from the blurb that Guy sent me, I'd much rather try for the Cali position. The stuff they do is a lot more closely related to what I'm doing now and has always been something I've been interested in even though I don't have real hands on experience with it. Heck, I'd even consider it if it were located in Podunk-Middle-of-Freaking-Desert-That-Will-Sink-During-Next-Earthquake, CA... erm... but the cross-country thing is a bit daunting. *clings to/pushes away PoohFamily* Maybe I should re-evaluate how I really feel about those relocation choices I keep putting down on applications. Bah.
Or maybe I just want to win the freaking lottery so I can kick back, start my own company, and have minions of my own. *sigh*
Today I'm going to attempt to take REAL data. KEEP THOSE FINGERS CROSSED, DAMN YOU!
ETA:
To Jenai,
Did not go to Bux for morning caffeine fix. BUT day is not over yet.
Just got a call from some lady saying she has already been interviewing candidates for a job position and she was searching for online resumes to fill another position when she came upon an abbreviated version of mine. Now she thinks I'd be a great fit for the first position even though they're not looking for my major. (I have no suit!) I'm supposed to send her my full resume and she said she was going to call me back tomorrow to go over the position in detail. This position is in Hackensack, which... meh.
I know it's nothing to get really excited about because this is what headhunters do. But considering I've been spending almost all my time trying to finish up here and not as much time actually searching for a new job, it's still kind of weird to get these kinds of calls. Stupid self-esteem issues and the inability to comprehend why anyone would actually want me, blahblahblah. *SIGH*
My circuit works! Well, at least, it does today. Data's really noisy, but whatever. Also, not sure how accurate data is, but WHAT.EVER. It's generating waveforms, and I.Don't.Care.Anymore. There is data, goddammit. Even if the information doesn't give the same Cool New Results I got from my last data set many years and two circuit changes ago. Oh well. It works! Or at least, it did. I had to untape myself from it so I could run out and buy more surgical tape. So now I don't know if it'll work again. Also, can't take real actual data for analysis because ThatGuy isn't here and I need to use his EKG circuit with mine. Grrrr. Answer your emails and phone, dammit!
Also, other girl is now using the one computer that has all the hardware/software needed to collect data. Sigh. Everyone cross your fingers that circuit will still work for the rest of the week. CROSS THEM, DAMN YOU!
1. It's very weird in my head. Had a messed up dream last night that Steph, Meg, and I were in Paris, being chased by BadMen who we originally thought might be potential stalkee-squee material, only to... you know... not. (Nevermind I've never been to Paris before and would have no clue that I was actually there.) We each grabbed a disposable cell, split the cash, split up, and each had to lose our chaser. For some reason my cab driver refused to take me to the airport, so I ended up in some Vegas-style hotel that had a zoo and hid out there watching seals play (THE FUCK?). And I kept trying to get in touch with Meg or Steph, but they weren't answering their phones. And then Jenai was giving me BadGuy location updates via a commlink surgically implanted behind my ear. And then I woke up.
2. It's quite possible the above dream was because those were the last three people I was chatting with last night. And because Steph had me frantically searching for a reasonably priced ticket to Detroit for the July 4th weekend. Memo to self: don't ever do a panic search that late at night because it will fuck up my dreams. Also, stop reading crappy bad!fic late at night because it will do the same.
3. I'd analyze the dream more, but I'm pretty sure the general basis is that I want a vacation. Lalalalala.
4. I actually made a decision. (Shut up, it happens.) Decided not to splurge to go see Steph (two years! *clings*) and Rach (*clings, too*) and Jenai (*...uh... I've already seen you recently* :P). If I had a job, I would totally have considered it. Instead, I will save up for a Toronto trip for AFTER I finish up here. *nods* Which brings me to this question: does it actually count as saving money if there is no income? I need to eat. I need Bux! Oh, right... I guess I can save with the exchange rate...
5. I am retaining water. Major water retention. No, not in that way. Thing2 said my fingers are getting swollen. Not just chubby, but swollen. First, that was a mean thing to say to me. Second, this is why I've decided maybe I need to start exercising. Third, gotta remember to drink more water. Fourth, maybe I should be worried if it's indeed... erm... water retention swelling disease-y thingamabob. I know there's a name for it, but I'm in the midst of a major brainfart right now.
6. Half of my circuit doesn't work very well. I NEED DATA THIS WEEK DAMMIT. If it doesn't work later, I WILL HAVE TO MAKE SHIT UP. Erm... as long as I can DISCUSS and EXPLAIN the data, this should be... well, it's wrong, but dammit, I NEED TO GET OUT. I will cry.
7. Am meeting Thing2 at the mall for lunch. We're getting PoohBro an iPod for his high school graduation present. When I graduated, they all chipped in for a huge Poohbear. How is that fair? Hrmph. But it's also partly his 'don't get lost!' present, since he's spending next month in Taiwan and flying there all by himself, with a layover in Tokyo. Boy has never been on a plane by himself. Knows no Japanese. And his minimal Chinese skills. Very worrisome. He's just a BABY, dammit! He can't take care of himself! *worries*
I like 7. It's my lucky number, so I'm gonna stop the list right there. However... TRIX, Pooh needs suit! Are you free this weekend or the weekend after the 4th? Or hell, even the 4th, since I have no life.
Hmm... wonder if my Bux guy is working today... *hides from Jenai* I did a lot of damage in four days. *neeners at Jenai* lmfao.
Sis has stolen my strappy heels and my hairclip. I guess it's okay, considering the fam is going to an awards ceremony for an academic scholarship. Not cool is that because it's awarded through the government, it's being held during the Army Bday Ball. (lmao) I spent half an hour trying to curl her hair and put it in an up-do -- a highly dubious task given my lack of any 'girl skills.' And then she just washed it out and stole my clip. Grr. Also not cool is that I made a special trip back to the apartment to pick up some of my dresses for the mom, who has nothing nice to wear. Only she decided to wear something else. And then, later, I'm told that since Thing1 is going back tomorrow only and PoohBro's HS graduation is Thursday, we're going to take the ANNUAL FAMILY PICTURES tomorrow. Nice. Why didn't someone tell me that when I was making a clothing run? I could have picked up some nice black pants or something (shaddup, Jenai). Sigh.
They're gone. All gone. Pooh's all alone. And doesn't get to see all the hot guys in dress uniform. Bah.
*grumble* pressure, damn pressure, stupid pressure, how to pressurize... *grumble*
I got both my mics hooked up to me and at least on the scope, it works. YAY! But um, one circuit keeps giving me a bit of an inverted signal, which makes NO sense because I know I made them both the same exact way. omgHATEScircuitsSOmuch.
How much?
T H I S M U C H
*makes self feel happy and better with pretty spoilery SGA pictures* I love when they keep putting more pics up. Rowr!
Okay. Gonna leave now. If it's not raining, gonna bust out Tootie and take her for a few spins around the track. Then will go home, eat somewhat healthy, and rewrite Chapter 3 to the best of my knowledge. And then, only then, will I feel like I deserve my Bux fix tomorrow. (Have decided to not be such a junkie by going from 'every day' to 'every other day' and maybe eventually get all the way to 'every third day... supplemented by DD's Coolata.' Mmmm.) And thank goodness Jenai is in L.A. and therefore canNOT nag me about the EVILNESS of Bux. *neeners*
The action of sitting down is really taxing the thighs. Sorta reminds me of being forced to use the hole after the climb up the Great Wall last summer. Damn my weak leg muscles! /whine whine whine
Warning Ahead: BoringResearchCrap and Freakin'JobHunt
Have run into snag. Output signals from the mic circuit do not come in nice, neat, sine waves. Nope. Stupid mics are really sensitive and pick up on everything. Very hard to do a freq response for the mics themselves. But have run them together and they are showing relatively matched zigzags. Relatively.
Oh! And I fixed the crappysolderedmic and did it the correct way. Except I burned finger with flying molten soldering tin (OW!). And it's still shorted (*headdesk*). And the padding on the other side is... yup, pretty much finished (D'OH!). Eh. Just gonna move it along and not worry about it. I can explain everything away with the handy dandy "sources of error" and "recommendations for future research."
Which brings us to why I still haven't taken data, and at this point, might as well, if I'm gonna pull the 'I can B.S. discuss/explain anything in Chapter 5' card. One data acquisition system in the lab. BUT WHERE ARE THE DAMN CABLES? No one is here to help me refamiliarize myself with this damn thing and I think the other girl in the lab - the one I don't know - took all the cables. Heard something about how she's meeting someone here tomorrow to do something, and he's the guy who knows all the stuff about this pack. If she took the cables so she can have them for Friday, I will HURT SOMEONE.
Ok. Who am I kidding? Like I was going to churn out data right now when it's just me here. (Reminder to self: gotta find 7 more victims.) Though, it's almost the end of June and... erm... I should be onto the analysis part now. *hates on project* Maybe I'll just really make sure everything works on the scope first. *sigh*
Email today -- some recruiter is trying to recruit me for a research position in California. No details yet. But umm... it's hot in California. And there's earthquakes. And huge destructive fires. And really pretty, shallow, health-conscious, plasticized people. And there's no one there I can go crying to except family I don't want to keep in touch with. And it's expensive there. And anyway, the job is more bio/chem than I'd probably feel comfortable with. So. Meh.
There are exactly 15 steps between the front door and the apartment proper. I know this because I had to walk down them this morning. What is it about going down stairs when your legs and thighs are stiff that's so much more of a pain than going up? Am not looking forward to that either.
Thank goodness it's raining pretty hard outside. Otherwise, my crazy brain may feel compelled to go for a long walk later, since walking is also very good for you and better than nothing. ...erm... yeah, that's it.
I ran a mile today. Yay! Ok, actually 0.5 miles and then the other 0.5 miles on/off, but hey, it counts. Then I walked the track for half an hour. That counts, too. But damn if my legs weren't killing me. Need to do better stretches next time. Still, pretty good considering I haven't exercised in... erm... many many days.
Then I had a healthy dinner. (still laughing about that)
And was rewarded for my new health kick with new Atlantis S2 spoiler pics! Weeeeeeeeeeeeee! Cannot wait for "Conversion." *pets boyfriend*
I hate to give into the stereotype, but sometimes being a girl is really easy. Especially when you need something. From a easily manipulated guy. I got one of the guys in the lab to solder two new tiny mics for me. All I had to do was bat my eyelashes a few times and make the voice a little more girly than usual. So simple. Not only did he do two of them - that's four really tiny soldering points - but that was even after he taught me how to do it correctly. Too bad the mics are slightly out of the freq range that I need, GRRR. But push comes to shove and the other ones don't work, I can always use these. And then I tried to get him to fix the one I messed up last night. Felt guilty about using him earlier because the tiny points are a PAIN, so I offered him lunch for the more important one. Mostly because I know he's not going to collect on it anyway. Sneaky. Sadly, he said I really shouldn't use the melted mic (but it works! I swear to god, it'll still work, it just needs to... *grumble sigh*).
Apparently, and I've been told this many times by numerous people, the advisor is really laid back and as long as I get data and analyze that data, it doesn't matter how you got it and whether it's actually "right." Ha. Hell, even the prof saw me today and commented to another guy that I've been coming around a lot lately and staying late -- like he was really impressed but surprised why. And when the guy said it was because I wanted to finish, prof gave a dismissive noise, like 'still, why so much work.' Don't know why I'm making this more difficult than it needs to be. It's like I'm mentally conditioned to be anally retentive about this when no one, not even him, expects or even wants perfection. Bah. (Maybe I'm just really scared of finally leaving and joing the horrible scary Real World for reals this time. Hmm, better not psychoanalyze. Very scary in head.)
Anyway. Got two shiny new mics for backup. AND I think I'm going to go running today. Really. The heatwave finally broke so I shouldn't suffer too too much from a bit of exercise, right? (Don't answer.)
Still have one really great mic. Made a new one with the last mic cap that I had. That one worked pretty well, too, but not as great as the first one. And that second one still sucked ass. So. I tried to re-solder the damn thing.
And sorta melted off the padding on the other side.
And somehow shorted it. Still can't figure out how to fix that. The solder for the two leads must be touching somewhere, but the damn thing is so DAMN tiny that I...
*sob*
What to do what to do what to do. I can't solder for my life! I hate soldering! Ok, actually soldering is fun, except when the damn thing is SO DAMN TINY. And.
I have no more mics of that model to play with. Which means make the really great one and the okay great one work exactly the same. Or. Start soldering the other model that I have, which I only have two of, and I need two. And.
I WANT TO DIE RIGHT NOW.
That latte buzz didn't cover shit like this.
And now I don't want to play with solder anymore. WHERE IS EVERYONE? Someone needs to come in and solder this shit for me. I will even put out, dammit.
SIGH.
I had a plan today. Get both mics to work, have my damn latte, and then go running. It was going to be the start of the Happy Pooh phase. And now, I just wanna cry. Although, I am contemplating whether I should go run as a productive way to combat stress. Or you know, go home and eat something really fattening, especially since I haven't eaten all day and I KNOW that's no good at all.
Dammit. I went from thisclose to thisthisthisthisclose back to this close to finally collecting data. *must think positively* At least I have my final chapter already written in my head, that's gotta count for something, since it only takes but a few hours to transfer from head to paper. Grr. This blows.
Oh yeah. Just in case y'all are wondering... this blog will probably be a stress outlet specifically for this stupid project for the next month or two (until the boyfriend comes back on TV in July). Also, very helpful since I work things out better while typing what I'm thinking (whoa, grammar!). Erm... y'all can go read a book, paint your nails, or um... whatever. 'Cuz it'll probably get really boring here on out (unless you read my occasional LJ posts).
Well... I caved. I have my Bux in hand and I'm happier than I have been the past week or so. (Stupid addictive caffeine!) Not so happy that the only person I recognized on the shift was the one guy who's always asking my name (which he didn't) and who always gets my order wrong (surprisingly didn't). So all in all, a good start to the day... erm, if you consider 2PM the start of the day, that is. *ashamed*
Real life stressing (which probably no one will understand or want to understand):
So my 3-stage circuit had matching responses, which is of the good. I checked just the first 2-stages, just in case I didn't need that last one, and those had really close matching responses, too. That is also of the very good. But then...
There's always a "then." Fucking "thens"!
I added my mic and driver circuits to the two circuits. Didn't try to match the freq responses, yet. Just hooked the mics up to my neck to check for a wave. One worked beautifully. The other circuit, not so much, but I figure that's because one stupid resistor is almost 10x larger than its corresponding one in the other circuit. So I tried testing both mics on the one circuit I know is working spectacularly. And yeah... freaking saturation on one mic and hardly a blip on the other. And THAT means... ok, the saturation doesn't bother me, but the other one... grr... I may need to resolder that one. Or get a new mic.
Damn. Who has time for this? Other than that, though, I know my two circuits work so when the advisor said it would only take me a couple of days to collect data, I do believe he was right. Just gotta get everything working again. AND HOW THE FUCK IS IT MID-JUNE ALREADY?!
That's it. After talking to One, I think I'm going to reneg on my self-imposed exile from Bux. I need my fix, dammit. For I have been seriously sliding into some weird funky depression state lately. Ugh. It'll be nice to be back where everyone knows my name. Heh.
The hazards of being a girl. Or, what happens when you say you're going to get your hair cut (3 months ago) and don't. OR, possible clues that your hair may have reached the "OMG, too long!" stage:
1. It takes you almost half an hour to wash the damn thing, which really sucks if you shower in the morning and decide you really need to wash it.
2. It's way too hot to leave down. And when you do leave down, would rather chop off your head because it gets way too hot and sweaty on the back of your neck.
3. It takes you forever to brush it up into a neat ponytail because it's too long and/or too thick. And every time you pull it through the elastic band (requiring anywhere between 2-4 loops), you need both hands to make sure all the hair has passed through the loop and the ends haven't been caught in the elastic before you can loop it through again. For the record, I need to loop the elastic 3 times and it's always a pain when part of it starts pulling at your scalp because I haven't pulled it all the way through the first time.
4. Even when it's up, any end that is hanging down gets caught around your neck when you lean back. (Also, see: when hair gets in your mouth.)
5. Whipping your head around quickly, especially when hair is in said ponytail, can become a method of inflicting serious harm. To people standing too close to you. And most importantly, TO YOURSELF. Omg. Ouch.
And what I experienced today, while walking to the lab:
6. When you're walking and ALL you can feel is your ponytail bouncing around behind your head like an extra limb. I'm not talking about cute little ponytail bouncing. I'm talking taking the whole entire head bobbing around because your hair, even put up, is too long and, subsequently, getting heavy. I think I almost gave myself a concussion. No joke.
Of course, the bouncing may have just been a byproduct of having too much spring in my step. But since I'm pretty sure I haven't felt springy since... erm... EVER... I think the ponytail-induced motion sickness may be due to the length of hair and NOT on the way I walk. Or at least I hope I don't walk funny.... Great. Now I'm all paranoid. *sigh*
In conclusion, MUST GET HAIR CUT. Hmm. Shoulder-length should be good since I'm scared to go shorter.
Hmmm. Have turned off all the lights in an attempt to keep the apartment cool. But it's boring being in the dark by myself.
Meh. I can't wait until I get a real job and my own apartment. It'll be all about the central air, baby. Or, lacking that, walking around nekkid. Erm, or something.
Came back to the apartment to see the futon open and a couple of duffel bags scattered around the living room. I guess the Roomie's Friend - the one I can stand - has come for his week-long summer stay.
It is 11PM. I am still in lab. I've been here since 1PM.
And here is where I get really geeky, because I need to rant about my research, and there's no way I can do it without being all s-m-r-t (well, where I fake it) and crap.
I spent a few hours rechecking and updating my references. Ended up with 54 journal articles. Dude. And yeah, you better believe I've read all of them. Now, whether I remember what any of them said... that's a whole other matter. See, most people would wait until the end to do this, but I like being ass-backwards. Plus, it let me procrastinate on the harder stuff, which I eventually got to.
*sigh*
First step before I can actually collect data is to make sure my 2-circuit PCG had matching frequency responses. Otherwise, I can't take simultaneous data and have the comparison mean something. But dammit! You know what happens when you haven't touched your damn circuit in over... erm... in kind of a long time? Yeah, you forget things. Like how to use a freaking frequency generator. Or the new digital scope that the lab purchased when you weren't looking. Dammit, I like my nice simple, low-fi analog systems! (God, I just sounded really old just now. Brrr.) Okay. So here's the thing. My two curves actually do match (WOOHOO!) but I think my actual cutoff frequency is lower than it should be (like, a lot). And I have no clue if my mics still work or if they match because I don't really know how to test that out. Argh. This all sucks because 1) no time to remake circuits, 2) no time to order new parts, 3) must collect all data and do analysis by end of this month, and 4) it's... wow, how is it almost middle of June already, WTF?
BUT. I would like to say that my graphs do match. At least I have that for now. *pats self on back* And at least I know I can write fast and analyze quickly, so I'm not worried about that. It's the fact that I really don't know much about circuits and yet, howthefuck did I let myself get talked into doing this project? Yeesh.
And dammit. I haven't had lunch or dinner today. All I had was some toast this morning, and a large latte from DD. (Ha! I will wean myself off Bux if it kills me!.. or at least until they hire a store-ful of new employees so I can start fresh without my newfound Norm status.) Hmm... fuckkit. I'm going home now. I'm going to die if I don't get something in my stomach. And actually, I'm glad I stayed this late today -- it's a nice preview of how the next few weeks might be for me. *scared*
This afternoon, when I left the apartment, I didn't realize the downstairs neighbor was standing on his patio watering his flowers. That is, until he said, 'Hi, sweetie!' to me.
Yeah. That stopped me pretty much right there. *adds this to the list with Bux for creepiness* Sweetie? Erm, okay. I've only made small talk with him maybe twice in the two years I've been living here. And it's just odd, to me anyway, to be ... erm... this old... and being called 'sweetie' by strange older men.
(Shut up.)
In other news: It's hot. It's really hot. It's really fucking hot. And humid. And living on the second floor sucks because all that hot air just stays in the apartment. There's no breeze! I am finally thinking about splurging on an a/c. They're cheap enough to make it worth it, right? Except no job now means being a stingy bitch. But damn if the fan isn't doing much for me, even with all the lights off. *sigh*
I got a phone call first thing this morning. Thankfully, I had just woken up and was able to sound all fresh and chirpy and wonderful instead of feeling omgIhavetowaketoanothersuckydayofmysuckylife woe. It was only from a recruiter based in Connecticut (sounds like a big firm, and places nationwide), but still... a call is a call, and I only uploaded my resume into all those icky databases late last night (as Jenai can attest, for I was griping about the stoopidness of those things). Yay! I'm looking at this in a positive light, especially since he sounded all excited about my resume (and then disappointed when I told him I was tied until August due to Real Life). But again, YAY! Because maybe - just maybe - I am actually employable as a Real Employee and not just Slave Labor. Weeeeee!
Crappy. This reminds me that I really need to get another suit. Don't think the one I got already is conservative enough (and anyway, that still needs to be tailored). Stoopid conservative industry. Pffft. Also must really get haircut. Oh, yeah. And FINISH. *grumble*
Yeah, I kinda love PoohMommy. Because she rocks like a rocking mom.
Went to the parents' after my six hours of plodding around in the lab to see if my notebook was hiding somewhere in the house. (It wasn't, dammit!) But the Poohrents weren't there. (Tonight is PoohBro's senior awards ceremony.) PoohMom left a note saying she saved Pooh dinner AND already packed up all the leftovers for the Pooh to take back to the apartment. Gotta give her credit. She is determined to make sure I eat right, no matter how much I try to rebel. Heh. *smooches PoohMommy*
Now if I can only find that stupid notebook. Otherwise, I may need to redo my circuit, and that's SO NOT GOOD. All depends on what happens in the next few hours -- gotta google some circuits to make sure mine is right. *sigh*
Am upset the SGA pilot DVD didn't arrive yet. *pouts* But I got me some hot sexy geek! Mmm to the Dead Zone S3 DVDs. I love getting packages. Rowr.
I've decided I am no longer playing my Bux game anymore. The other day, the Starbucks guy said 'Hi, Pooh' to me when he passed me in the parking lot. See, it's one thing if they just say 'hi.' It's another thing if they append your name to it. But it's an entirely different thing if they do it outside the confines of the store (especially when I don't know their names). There are boundaries, people. When you take it upon yourself to cross that 'I order/You service' relationship, it becomes creepy. (Hmm, for some reason, that also kind of sounds dirty, which was not my intention. Honest.)
Then I went in today for what's turning into my almost-daily fix of caffeine, to have the girl behind the counter ask me what my name was again and say that she will never forget it now. And the guy making my drink, who's only taken my order once before (and got it wrong), but has never before asked me my name, suddenly knew it. And the girl was saying how I'm going to turn into a celeb at that store and...
It's all getting very sad and freaky. Ever since last month, I've needed a daily dose of caffeine to get me through the day, and all because of Jenai, I've become addicted to everything. (Oh, suuuuure, the iced tea is the only non-addictive drink there. Try some. *smap*) But now, with this creepy realization that my file at this particular Bux is probably growing by the second, I'm starting to rethink my preferred source of caffeine.
This is so very sad. *smaps self* I may need to switch over to Dunkin Donuts for awhile...
Okie. Back to work. I touched my circuit, people. I am thisclose to actually taking data. Woot!
Ripped apart the room, but I feel like I'm almost positive it should still be here somewhere. Have already cleaned the lab desk, so I know it's not there, unless it is, and I'm just blind, which is entirely possible. Maybe it's at the parents'. Oh dear god, let it be there. It only has my detailed circuit diagram in there, which I need in order to figure out WTF I was trying to do before I dropped off the face of the lab years ago! OMG. Okay. Not a problem. I can reverse-engineer this bad boy and figure out wtf I was trying to do. No biggie. Not like I don't need to do it anyway.
*more deep breathing*
Okay, that doesn't help at all.
All righty. I am getting my butt moving for sure this time. No net connection at my desk, which is of the GOOD, and I'm planning on staying there until the cleaning crew comes through at night. *nods* I can totally do this.
I am awake. I am going to shower. I am going to get caffeinated. I am going to bust my ass doing productive things. And if I come back tonight having done none of that, please kick my ass.
stupid cute fluffy emotionally manipulative kitty pics that pull on my girly and maternal heartstrings!/mutters
And NO, I have not been battling kitties on kittenwar for the past half hour. That would be a ridiculous waste of time.
Pooh wants a teeny tiny kitty now... with teeny tiny whiskers and a cute fluffy face and soft baby kitty meowing... that does cute little things for Pooh to ooh and ahh and giggle over.
*misses old kitty like whoa* Like the time the old kitty jumped behind the stove, landed on top of the sticky mouse traps, got stuck, and stayed stuck for a few hours until everyone came home from class and heard little kitty meowing and crying behind the stove. And bigger kitty was standing in the gap between the stove and cabinet, just watching over her. It was SAD, but omg so freaking ADORABLE (you know, in the way that parents think their kids are oh-so-cute even though they're obviously tards).
Okay. Just remembered that kitties get bigger - a lot bigger. And that old roomie sent me pics of little kitty and big kitty a few years ago, and they both got humongously fat, too. Hmm. I think I'm over it now. Phew.
Things From Today's Apartment Hunt Blitz Through Central PA With J:
1. We are tards. For example:
Pooh: Get off at Valley Forge Rd. (J drives, drives, drives) J: God, this is a really long road. (We see lots of grass and fields and keep driving and driving.) J: Oh, look! There's some tiny log cabins over there! (We look. We 'ooh' and 'ahh.' We look at all the cars parked in the middle of an empty field on the other side of the road.) Pooh: What are all those cars doing parked in the middle of nowhere? J: I have no clue. (A few seconds later.) Pooh: OH! Valley. Forge. DUH! J: Oh, god. We are such dumbasses.
Hey, my excuse is that I'm an engineer. I'm in a lab all the time. I have no clue about history or real life stuff. So there. *SMAPS SELF*
2. Apartments are grungy and cost too much. And apparently, leasing agents have different definitions for the term 'luxury apartments' than we mere mortals who actually know what 'luxury' is supposed to mean.
3. J really liked an apartment that was down the block from Trix's. Except it cost too much. LMAO.
4. PA sucks. No, really. I felt depressed and lonely just sitting in the car with J and driving around. *hides from Trix*
5. Apartment complexes around here really take their apartments seriously. I never knew apartments could have 'models' and 'samples.' And really, if your model is kind of grungy, maybe it's time to quit. (Best apartment seen today: a really crappy apartment with shelving over the breakfast bar. 'Shelving' meaning four wooden planks. Which weren't even straight. In their model apartment. Oy.)
6. My feet hurt. Who knew looking at apartments could be so tiring and it would involve so much walking? It was really hot. REALLY hot. I wore sandals (which I never do unless I'm dressing up); I wore a tank top (which I never do outside); I even finally took off the hoodie I was wearing over the tank (you usually have to kill me before I'd think to do that). So yeah. HOT.
7. Guy sitting in front of me on the train on my way back from J's place. Wearing a suit. Trying to surreptitiously drink a Smirnoff's while the train agent wasn't looking. Really, if you need to drink on the freaking train after a Monday at work? That's just sad.
8. It was raining and thundering and stuff. On my walk from the train station back to campus to pick up the car. I am soaked. I am hot. I am sticky. I am gross. Just thought you'd all like to know.
1. There's a bad kind of famous. And apparently, I'm it. Went to the lab today, met one of the "new" guys. Advisor introduced me with a 'you know..., right?' and the guy said 'oh, yeah, I know her.' This was before we introduced ourselves. I have no idea who that guy is, yet he knows me. I suck, and it's starting to look like everyone in the lab knows it.
2. Jenai, Buck's file on me must have been corrupted. My guy wasn't there, which sucks because it sets back my goal to become the 'Norm' of that Bucks where he'll have my order set as soon as I step in there. The guy who was there is the one who asks my name, every single time, even when there's like only two people in the store. And he always messes up my order. No whip=whip for him, always. *sigh*
3. Letting your mocha cool leaves about half an inch of bitter chocolate sludge at the bottom of the cup. Eww.
4. I stayed in the lab for four hours without twitching or pulling out my hair or going into body spasms.
5. Met the new cleaning guy who turned out to be Chinese, forced me to have a mini-convo with him, and said my Chinese was pretty good. Ahaha. Bwahahaha. Erm, okay, if he says so.
6. My resume is done! I even did the text file version of it! And you know what? It actually looks like I did stuff! Yay! But then I found an action verb list, so I think I'm going to go through and punch it up a bit.
7. Still have to write up a cover letter. BOO!
8. The Getting My Shit Together Update: 39 pages written. Granted, 12 pt font, double-spaced, and written years ago. Whatever. Some of it doesn't apply anymore, but hey, taking crap out is always easier than putting new stuff in. I expect maybe 20 pages of graphs and discussion and 4 pages of conclusions, and FINISHED. I CAN SO DO THIS!
After a lot of running around today, blah blah blah, Sylvie has officially become Poohmobile II. And then the inspection people told me I needed to change my rear tires because the treads are almost kaput. GRRR! *kicks Sylvie* Beyotch is so high maintenance, dammit.
Luckily, I don't really have to go far or to many places the rest of the week, so hopefully they'll be fine until I can get new tires next week. Just gotta get me the few miles to lab where I can procrastinate finish data collection and analysis this month (and therefore have plenty of time to concentrate on boyfriend when he comes back next month - OMG it's ALMOST July! weeeeeeeee! except for the whole RL thing that's stressing me out, BOO!) And also that extra mile to the Starbucks near the lab. I've decided to turn my trips into a game of sorts -- trying to see if it's possible to get sekrit discounts from my new friend. I will fake-flirt and whore myself out for caffeine!!!! At least for the next two months. I'm not that desperate.
J's taking the job in PA (Trix, near you!) instead of San Diego. She's got it in her head that I need to end up close to where she is, which would be PA and not San Diego. I'd prefer SD, because you know... PA... oy. But then again, that company is planning on increasing head count by 50%, which means massive hirings, and that means I guess I'm sending in my resume as soon as I finish polishing it up. Sigh. but omfg it's Pennsylvania! *SOBS*
